Too strong for his own good: depression - the silent killer of men. Part II: the solution.

By Dr. Amanda Craig, PhD, LMFT
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Depression is a major psychiatric disorder that frequently has biological underpinnings. It affects men and women equally, but men are less likely to seek treatment and four times more likely to commit suicide. This blog provides an overview of available treatment options and coping tools you can start using immediately. 

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If you or someone you care about is in crisis:
 
In Part I we explored the symptoms and unique challenges faced by men suffering from depression. We know that men are often hesitant to share feelings or seek help, which may be why men are four times as likely to commit suicide as women. It is important to reiterate once again that if you or someone you care about is in crisis, we urge you to seek help immediately.

You can:

• Call your doctor or therapist
• Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room
• Call 24-hour National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255); TTY at 1-800-799-4889. 

 
If these measures seem drastic, remember that a life is at stake. 

The treatment of depression

While there isn’t a one-size-fits-all prescription to cure depression, there are scientifically-driven treatments that can help one recover. Psychotherapy, medication, or the combination of the two are among the most common and effective solutions, but one should also consider alternative treatments and lifestyle changes to amplify the effects of standard therapies. In addition, a physical checkup with your primary care doctor can rule out illnesses with similar symptoms and flush out physical causes of depression, including the side effects of prescription medications.

However, before we dive into coping tools for depression, let’s talk about what will NOT help. Self-medication with alcohol, drugs, excess food, porn, gambling, shopping, or binge-watching TV may seem like comforting solutions, but they only temporarily numb out the pain and ultimately create more problems and deepen the depression by impairing health, creating personal, financial, and legal problems, and inducing shame.

Medication
Psychiatric medications used to treat depression are called antidepressants. Different types of antidepressants address varying causes of depression and provide corresponding solutions. Although a general practitioner can prescribe antidepressants, a psychiatric specialist is usually better trained to assess the condition, find the best course of treatment, hone in on the right medication combination and dosage, and minimize any side effects. It is important to note that antidepressants may take several weeks to become effective, may cause serious side effects, and should not be discontinued without doctor’s supervision.

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Seeking help does not make one weak -
​it makes one smart.
-Dr. Amanda Craig, PhD, LMFT

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Psychotherapy
Psychotherapy provides a platform to talk about things that are troubling you, express feelings, address behaviors, and develop coping skills. The goal of individual therapy is to feel better and live to your fullest potential. Therapy is confidential and can be tailored to your unique needs and preferences. There are many different types of therapy. Couples or family therapy is a form of talk therapy that provides people with an opportunity to strengthen emotional connections, repair attachment injuries, improve communication, and learn conflict resolution skills. When a relationship gets stronger each person in the relationship feels better.

Brain stimulation therapies
Brain stimulation therapies rely on special devices to stimulate the brain using electric and magnetic fields and include the highly effective electroconvulsive therapy and transcranial magnetic stimulation. These therapies are often used in cases of severe depression and when other therapies fail. 

Personal coping skills
Developing coping skills is an invaluable complement to antidepressants and psychotherapy that can mean the difference between speedy recovery and a long battle. Here are some evidence-based techniques and strategies for beating depression:

• Name your feelings. Acknowledge and nameyour sad, lonely, rejected, abandoned, feelings.  Giving them a name has been scientifically proven to call the mind.  Be curious about them.  Understand why they are happening or what is triggering them.  Maybe it’s the time of the year that is triggering sadness or a toxic relationship triggering rejection and abandonment.  Next, think about how to express what you are feeling.  Is it something that just needs to be acknowledged before the feeling passes or does it need to be shared with others, an action taken or a boundary set?
• Get support. Isolation feeds depression and boredom. Surround yourself with people you can vent to and share with: people you can lean on and count on in hard times.  Spend time with people that are positive, happy, helpful, and inspired. Reduce or distance from toxic relationships.
• Practice good self-care. Get plenty of sleep, exercise, eat well, avoid mind-altering substances, and be gentle on yourself by temporarily simplifying your schedule and lowering your performance expectations.
• Amplify your positive experiences. When we focus on negative self-talk and failure, we set ourselves up to fail and feel bad.  When we experience happiness, gratitude, and optimism, we naturally seek out more of the same. Go to places that encourage creativity, inspiration and joy. Find things that stimulate energy fun and curiosity even small things like opening the blinds, making the bed, eating a healthy yummy breakfast. Train your brain to focus on the good with positivity exercises.  
  • make a list of positive things that happened today 
  • scan the situation for the positive
  • be aware of negative thoughts and try to shift to positive
• Practice gratitude. Neuroscientists have found that gratitude is a powerful natural antidepressant, which works, similarly to Prozac, by boosting serotonin, a “happy” neurotransmitter. However, feeling grateful amidst depression may seem impossible. Focus on practicing gratitude rather than feeling it. Watch for the small signs of feeling better.  Find gratitude in the small moments of relief from depression, notice the times when you feel stronger.  A gratitude list can bolster new wins and help the mind recognize the shift from depression or loneliness. Honoring our process and expressing appreciation can make healing intentional. 

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​Depression is not a weakness of character nor is it a sign of personal deficiency. It is a serious psychiatric condition that can lead to suicide. We urge you to not suffer in silence and solitude: reach out and get the support you deserve. Asking for help doesn’t make one weak, it makes one smart. You deserve to be happy. Don’t let depression rob you of your joy and life!

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Read Part I of this blog. Too strong for his own good: depression - the silent killer of men. 

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Download our printable
​Men and Depression brochure. 

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